Gee, Buck, you sound so incredulous! You’re not practicing to be an attorney, are you? To answer a few of your questions:
> Do you really have triple layer flies?
Uh…yeah. You’re forgetting the turned over hem, aren’t you? On the piece I’m examining right now, in some places the fly is FIVE layers thick, where a turned hem crosses under a seam. Makes for a bunched wad of fabric in all the wrong areas, if you ask me.
> But why do you want to sew up the fly?
You’ve never gotten yours unintentionally hung up in the fly mechanism? Maybe we’re anatomically different, but this happens to me a fair amount. Even though I don't use the fly, it is a lurking trap door. You fly-boys are aware that lots of mens briefs are made withOUT the trap door these days? Might even say it's something of a trend.
> ...really a significant problem, or just one of things that peeve a person?
How do I answer that? You say poe-tay-toe, I say puh-tat-oah, It’s irritating enough I am looking for alternatives. Satisfactory?
You cold weather guys have given me a different perspective on the fly, though. I seldom carry my unit into really cold weather (being a desert dweller myself) and I can see that manifold layers of insulation, and a tiny trap door for access, and maybe even a gore-tex vestibule, might actually come in handy in sub-freezing weather. So, point taken, metaphorically speaking.
Since this thread got so much attention, I did a bit of research and found another hilarious thread, where 228 people voted on whether they use the fly for urination (including apparently 32 women who voted). In the longstanding tradition of open-mindedness and a profound respect of diversity, the thread is primarily devoted to abusing and mocking people who pee differently than themselves:
Let’s just say that the fly has been manfully defended in this thread. You like ‘em, I don’t, and I guess I’ll be buying women’s underwear. Now if I can just keep ‘em away from the wife.
PS: Thanks to all who submitted flyless alternatives, I'll be checking those out.