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spelt !
(spelt) - F

Locale: Midwest
Re: Re: relative quality on 06/09/2013 11:06:14 MDT Print View

>>I'd rather play with the smartass intelligent adults here.

That's my preference also, but it does drive some people away needlessly. Daniel was an odd duck, but sincere. I'm as guilty as anyone else for not speaking up about the provocation or his original derailment. I think there's room in the "honor code" to recognize that some folks don't have the temperament to be poked, but that they can still have a place here. Maybe the majority thinks that too kumbaya.

Ken Thompson
(kthompson) - MLife
Re: relative quality on 06/09/2013 11:14:40 MDT Print View

Well the roughhouse turns to tears scenario happens. Online with the lack of nuance that comes with actual voices having a conversation more so . It's really hard to tell when and where somebody is coming from a lot of time. Spend a few minutes reading other posts by someone before determining how to deal with them. Me, I like it blunt and up front. I like to think i can take as well as I can give. Never any malice. Just calling a duck a duck sometimes.

Marko Botsaris
(millonas) - F - MLife

Locale: Santa Cruz Mountains, CA
Re: Re: relative quality on 06/09/2013 12:49:48 MDT Print View

" It's really hard to tell when and where somebody is coming from a lot of time. "

That is certainly true on any forums, but I have noticed that here there is a very increased level of (I will not call it sophistication) mocking and winking that can often make it extra difficult here. That, combined with the normal crackpot post now and then make it yet harder. I still do a double take once a month or so where I have to ask myself "was that post serious, or did I just get punked?". On BPL the line is very thin sometimes.

I usually enjoy it, and have always chalked it up to the absurdity, on the face of it, of a lot of things we take very seriously here. As in "did I really just say I was willing to spend an extra $200 to save an oz or two?", or "am I actually looking at charts of the exponential decay of moistness in drying trail runners, and am I actually totally invested, and really care about which of the already fast-drying shoes is the best?" The answer is usually "yes", but the sane mind can only survive in the presence of such ultimate silliness by mocking itself (and others sometimes) to some degree.

Edited by millonas on 06/09/2013 12:52:02 MDT.

Ken Thompson
(kthompson) - MLife
Re: relative quality on 06/09/2013 12:56:34 MDT Print View

"but I have noticed that here there is a very increase level of (I will not call it sophistication) mocking and winking that can often make it extra difficult here."

Amazing how eloquent some of the put downs are delivered. Some crafty wordsmiths out there. Lot of cheap shots too. Some of those are hilarious though.

There are a lot of inside long running jokes amongst some long time posters that must seem really weird to a newcomer.

It is also so easy to hit post reply. Then later, well, you know....

Marko Botsaris
(millonas) - F - MLife

Locale: Santa Cruz Mountains, CA
Re: Re: relative quality on 06/09/2013 13:17:50 MDT Print View

"It is also so easy to hit post reply. Then later, well, you know...."

Oh yes...I know. LOL

I would never admit to this myself, of course! But there is a pretty hilarious episode of "The West Wing" nodding at the danger of hitting "post", even on a totally silly forum (in this case I believe it was called lemonlymon.com), and "putting it out there" without proper forethought. As usual, the "incident" spirals out of control, eventually causing congressmen to scream foul, until it virtually effects the president himself.

Edited by millonas on 06/09/2013 13:18:36 MDT.

Jennifer Mitol
(Jenmitol) - M

Locale: In my dreams....
10 essentials on 06/09/2013 14:44:49 MDT Print View

Did this really all stem from the 10 essentials thread, or was there another one?



And in case it wasn't terribly obvious, I don't take anyone or anything too seriously; I dish it, I take it. Life is way too short for that. Except for that bit about exponential evaporation rates of trail runners. You wouldn't kid about that, would you Mark?

Katharina ....
(Kat_P) - MLife

Locale: Pacific Coast
Re: 10 essentials on 06/09/2013 15:36:58 MDT Print View

Hi Jennifer,
There was another thread that now is gone. There have been several instances throughout the years. One poster is gone, maybe another. Others have left in the past.
I think it's great that you have a light, good attitude here and I have not seen any vitriol coming from you. It is here, though and I am not immune to it.
To just brush this aside as something that is now solved, now that a poster has left us, is not a long term solution in my opinion.
I guess it is a very human/ animal trait to pick on the weak, and here weak can mean all sorts of things that we usually don't think of as weak.
If we see someone headed for a fall, someone that is easy to humiliate because their come backs will only dig them further in the hole, what is the best thing to do?
When someone tries to deal with it by posting a level headed reply ( like Dale did) that seems to allow for retraction and less knee jerk reaction- should we give that a little time to work, before starting on the frenzy?
Like I said, I am not pointing fingers as I know I have participated in less than gracious discussions here. I am saddened though that a situation that I think was salvageable, ended badly. For all I know they could have learned something positive here.


Remind me of this when I blow it.

Marko Botsaris
(millonas) - F - MLife

Locale: Santa Cruz Mountains, CA
Re: Re: 10 essentials on 06/09/2013 18:26:19 MDT Print View

I went back to see if anyone reacted when some of the insulting posts were made. Sad to say no.

There were two in question by different posters in that thread that (in high sarcastic form that we would all get in a comedy club, but were nonetheless IMHO out of bounds) basically mock accusing him of being on drugs. That was pretty over the line, and kind of ignorant. Maybe you could say that to one of your buddies or traditional sparing partners that you know well, and possibly it would not bite bone 99/100 times otherwise, but really you don't play with that stuff with someone you don't know.

I remember he mentioned something just as he was going ballistic about having his reputation tarnished. At the time I didn't get it, but you really need to know someone a lot better before you say something like that. Anyway, would someone have been perceived as a mother hen if they tried to intervene at that point - I don't know. Might it even have made the offenses increase - I know the type, and I'm not sure. But there was an offline apology made later, to the effect that "I didn't think you were serious and shouldn't have done that". Unfortunately it seem it had all spiraled well out of control by then, at least from D's perspective.

Edited by millonas on 06/09/2013 18:29:41 MDT.

Marko Botsaris
(millonas) - F - MLife

Locale: Santa Cruz Mountains, CA
Re: 10 essentials on 06/09/2013 18:39:19 MDT Print View

"Except for that bit about exponential evaporation rates of trail runners. You wouldn't kid about that, would you Mark?"

Moi? I keed you not!

http://www.backpackinglight.com/cgi-bin/backpackinglight/water_weight_gain_and_loss_lightweight_shoes.html#.UbUgpZymgSk

http://www.backpackinglight.com/cgi-bin/backpackinglight/xdpy/forum_thread/3602/

Truth is stranger than fiction LOL.

Edited by millonas on 06/09/2013 18:43:24 MDT.