I got banned from The Lightweight Backpacker for talking about bodily functions from the effects of using Aqua Mira. All I mentioned was bad gas and diaherria. Go figure. Ryan please don't ban me for mentioning those two....please!

oh brother - what next? I mean we all get bad gas from time to time. I won't get offended if you tell me Aqua Mira gives you the farts.

Don't feel too bad. Several people were banned in 2004 from a (then popular) yahoo group merely for speaking their mind on a separate forum. The moderators saw what they said on another forum and then banned them from their own forum. It's all documented online. The posts are still there. As for me, I was banned from that same website in 2003 for joking around. I may have deserved it, but a second chance would have been nice. Since those times, most of the good posters are gone and the monthly traffic has dwindled to about a days worth of this sites traffic.

In another post I did on BPL about a cup, I mentioned it had a 's*crew (without the "*") cap' and they changed it to *BEEP* ! ! !

So to avoid the word s*crew I should have described the cap as a ' plastic molded threaded sealing device applied in a clockwise rotating action '.

S*crew that !

PS. Don't mention Uranus either !

Edited by ianwright on 12/14/2006 18:43:42 MST.

.

Edited by ben2world on 12/14/2006 20:59:33 MST.

Ian, that's funny, but I'm sorry about that...our profanity filter is not so...intelligent...It's automatic, a human did not actually take the time to change your post to *BEEP*...!

But it's important, for me, to have it in place because I don't want to discourage the parents of Scouts and other youth groups from viewing the forums here.

KEN: Some hikers might consider bad (especially LOUD) gas a beneficial side effect, if for nothing but its entertainment value. I mean, we all fart, right? Laurie, you fart don't you? Sure she does. All farters are welcome here.

Edited by ryan on 12/14/2006 23:03:41 MST.

What you missed is that Ken mentioned bad gas. In a tent, is there ever any such thing as GOOD gas?

Ian, i recently had the same thing happen, so the solution was simply to use the word "screwtop" or anything the fits. When included as part of a larger word, the filters are happy. The solution was Fartastic!

EDIT
----
You know, i never use that word. My wife doesn't like it.

True story: my son learned to talk at a very early age (words like "apple", though with more of a double 'b' sound, before 12mos and talking full sentences at 18mos). We taught him the word "flatulate". So here we are at my parents home for some holiday dinner. There he is in his little booster seat, using utensils on his own at a holiday meal and not being fed. First he separates all of the food items into little groups not touching one another and then proceeds to eat each group completely before going on to the next group (can you guess where those genes came from!!). A bit later, he 'breaks wind' and this 20month (or 21mo, i'm forgetting) old kid says "Oops, i flatulated badly". My father almost chokes and says "What did the kid say?!!!". My mother, like most Jewish mothers/grandmothers, exclaims with a proud look on her smiling face, "Oh, he's so smart!". I think one has to have some Jewish ancestry to really appreciate my mother's stereotypical response. Anyways, a flatulalistic tale, to be sure.

Edited by pj on 12/15/2006 03:54:55 MST.

That is why no one except my wife will share a tent with me. My gas problems at altitude is infamous.

My roommate 'flatulates' in his sleep, though its not nearly as rank as when he does it on purpose. I'm sure that's not very appropriate but I find it a little humorous. He also yells at me in his sleep and it can even be a little vulgar at times, but still funny.

Anyway, there's just something about being on the trail that hits my system hard. Everything smells a little worse on the trail for me, whether it be bodily functions or just me in general. Using a tarp dissipates the odors much better than my tent ever did though and I appreciate that.

Adam

High-Altitude Flatus Expulsion (HAFE)

High-altitude flatus expulsion (HAFE) is the spontaneous and unwelcome passage of increased quantities of rectal gas noted at high altitude. It may become an embarrassment but is of no true medical concern. Avoid foods such as chili and beans that are known to induce flatulence at low altitudes, and show consideration for other members of the party in sleeping arrangements. If stricken, a traveler may benefit from chewable tablets or simethicone (Mylicon 80 milligrams) or simethicone 80 milligrams with activated charcoal 250 milligrams (Flatulex tablets) once or twice a day. Charcoal Plus is another simethicone-activated charcoal preparation.

From Medicine For the Outdoors by Paul S. Auerbach, M.D. © 1999 by Paul S. Auerbach, M.D.; electronic rights by The Lyons Press

Edited by jshann on 12/16/2006 18:12:20 MST.

True confession time...I have to carry Gas-X or similar product in my kit. At least if I want others to hike with me. Walking seems to have some unintended consequences.

I utilize my flatulence on the trail for true UL purposes. Rather than carrying extra items that may provide extra warmth (i.e., an extra layer of clothing, a canister heater, etc.), I simply warm myself "dutch oven" style in my sleeping bag. I guess it's a good thing nobody ever shares a shelter with me or borrows my sleeping bag.

Actually, there is a fella I hike with that actually has a scale of flatulence magnitude named after him. Whenever someone in the group loses their manners, we rate it on the Kiilsgaard scale. By the way, 1 Kiilsgaard = 4.81 pascals (sp?), which is how much pressure the human body can hold before "relieving" some. Robert averages ~ 4-5 Kiilsgaards per calamitous occurrence.

Edited by jwetzelp on 12/16/2006 21:40:53 MST.

Last summer I had the (dubious) privilege of walking for about six hours behind this group of Japanese backpacking gentlemen, all of whom had generously partaken of the drink and numerous quantities of beans the night before. There I was attempting to enjoy the peace and quiet of the ridges, while occasionally halting for long moments to gaze at birds in the valley below, all while the "music" of my fellow walkers punctuated the tranquility with unlikely toots and whistles. When I just couldn't take it any more I let the group amble on ahead. Later that afternoon, as I was climbing the last hard slope of the day, I heard voices way above me, followed by three, distinct variations of Pachelbel's Canon... the final note a deep base that reverberated throughout the valley. I guess some ultralight acolytes think of ingenius alternatives to carrying around Alp Horns... certainly the effect was quite sonorous!

> High-Altitude Flatus Expulsion (HAFE)

That sounds quite similar to a disease that my friends and I became aware of at around 8,000' know and HAMB or commonly referred to as High Altitude Mountain Butt. I think it would be safe to assume that both have similar origins.

Oh, so that was what my hiking partner must have had. He use to blame it on Rocky Mountain Barking Tree Spiders.

If not for farts, how else would my nephews learn to pull my finger. Hours of entertainment for the young ones around the camp fire.

WARNING: Use caution around open flames, the life you save may be your own.

Thread hijacking at it's most foul! I really shouldn't add to this, but... Nothing makes the miles fly by faster than being self propelled. Also, I can think of nothing beside down that has done more for sleeping bag loft.

Edited by ericnoble on 12/17/2006 05:38:53 MST.

well I am always getting grief from hikers behind me....the reason? My jet propulsion gas explosions. They smell bad and give me rocket fuel to head up the trail!

Ryan wrote "I mean, we all fart, right? Laurie, you fart don't you? Sure she does. All farters are welcome here."

Well I won't admit to it usually. However - funny farting story. We were at dinner with one of my clients and his wife had made a mushroom chicken dish. My darling 5 year old boy made an announcement while she was dishing out my portion. "Oh oh! Mushrooms make my Mom get the farts!"

I actually bought this for my nephews this Christmas...

http://www.grandrivertoys.com/Pages/products/Fart_Fast_n_Flatulent_Guff_Game.htm

just to prove that I take farting in stride - lol.

actually I am very fortunate that I don't have farting issues on a hiking trip any worse than at home - we normally eat a ton of beans and legumes so my system is quite used to the food we take backpacking... mushrooms are the exception. I know TMI!

Edited by Laurie_Ann on 12/17/2006 17:18:22 MST.