"We're both dying in our respective corners here where I loath the day I carry more weight, and she would rather die than sleep on the ground w/ no floor."
You guys seem to have a fun relationship (at least you're smiling in the pictures) but this sounds like trouble. I travel pretty light in general, but you know what my pack weighs when I take the kids? I have no idea. I don't weigh the Dora dolls, the cheap polyester princess sleeping bags, the extra dresses and underwear, the comfort foods, and whatever else they want.
I am happy enough that they want to come with me, and my only priority is that they enjoy the experience enough to want to do it again.
This was one of my favorite quotes from Roman Dial----
"However there's one class of heavy trip I did repeatedly for a decade: family trips. One example, with my six year old son and a North Face VE 24, back in 1993. We walked 60 miles across Umnak, an Aleutian Island, just the two of us. I carried a big pack because he carried nothing. Sometimes I carried him, too, when he said "Dad, my feet hurt." but he always hopped down when I said, "Son, my back hurts."
I learned a lot on that trip! The best thing I learned was that he and I liked doing long wilderness trips together and that I liked being there with him, and liked looking after him. I found going heavy was Ok cause he needed more frequent rests too. I found stopping a lot and sharing the landscape and seascape views were good. I liked having all the stuff for him: big tent, two rain jackets for him, lots of fuel and a stove, a gun for protection against wild bulls, a camera to capture the trip, a book for us to read, plenty of snacks to keep him happy, a glass ball from a Bering Sea beach as a memento."
My advice, don't spend a lot of money on a new tent, or anything else for that matter. This is a one time offer from Kathleen, and if you stick to your UL guns, chances are good that's all it will be. So borrow a tent or bring the coleman (gasp). Bring a bottle of wine, a nice dinner, and whatever else might enhance the intimacy of the trip. Don't weigh anything. You'll have your whole life to indulge your UL fantasies, but only one chance to have a partner to do it with.
PS. If it's really important to Kathleen, Doug Ide might clue you in on an UL porta-potty made with a cuben seat and carbon fiber legs. Ask to borrow his movie projector at the same time.