My girlfriend and I each use a Gram Weenie alcohol stove, which is designed to work with small titanium mugs or pots.
We each boil water in our Snow Peak 450 mugs, then add the freeze dried meal, and cover for 10 minutes. We don't have a separate mug for drinking--all we need is our water bladder for that. When we're done, we rinse the mugs out, and then make coffee or tea. We do this in the morning with instant oatmeal as well. Its a minimal setup with no frills, but at a total weight of 3.5 ounces (100 grams for you Aussies!) for the mug, windscreen, stove, and lid, its pretty light.
We used to use a GSI tea kettle (5-6 ounces) but decided it was really redundant. We could boil water in our mugs! As far as the titanium mug being too hot to drink out of? I've learned that if the mug is too hot for my lips, the liquid is usually too hot to drink anyways. So, that doesn't bug me.
P.S. Before our trip, we divide up the freeze dried meals and repackage them. We also know how much water to put in our mugs to make the consistency right.