I still believe that the Aether 60 is going to be too much pack for what you need. If you just want to stick with "mainstream" brands that take a look at Gregory's Z55/65 and even Granite Gear's Vapor Trail, Nimbus and Vapor-- all will save you close to a full pound for about the same capacity.
- MSR Hyperflow-- since you are purchasing two 3L Platypus bottles, take a look at the Aquamira Froniter Pro water filter-- it weighs in at 2oz and costs around $20USD. Seach some of Jason Klass' youtube videos for more info on the set-up. Save 5oz and $80-- you could even pick up an extra Platypus and still save!
- Nix the Flex 3 and pick up a pot and two mugs like you already noted. AGG have some low cost options.
FWIW my wife and I started with two SP 700 pots and two MSR Titan mugs. We have since dropped one 700 pot and we could easily ditch one mug, but prefer the luxury of two. Set up (one pot + 2 mugs) weighs a little over 8oz. Throw in a cat can stove, two utensils, windscreen and a mini bic and we're at around 10oz. We also have a bigger pot that we could swap the 700 for and it would still weigh less than 1Lb.
- Only you know about your comfort level regarding the NeoAir. I have both a Therm-a-rest Deluxe (Regular) and a Z-lite (short). My wife however likes her BA Insulated. Some people, like my wife, hate torso and CCF pads, I sleep fine on them. It is personal preference.
- Nix the stove and go with an alcohol stove like already noted.
- Nix either two forks or two spoons-- there is no need for two forks and two spoons for two people!
- Kershaw Leek at 3oz is a whole lot of knife. Not sure what you plan to use it for, but I haven't used mine for anything more than cutting paracord, salami and cleaning fish. FWIW I use a Gerber Evo JNR (1.8oz) and that is considered heavy-- but cost around $15USD.
Tents have been mentioned before-- my wife and I use a Rainshadow 2, we need the extra space because of our dog, but just the two of us could easily get by in a Squall 2. Anyway, the shelter setup weighs around 2.5LBS and costs about $300-- which is around half the price of the Hubba HP and weighs more than a one pound less.