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Tad Englund
(bestbuilder) - F - MLife

Locale: Pacific Northwest
Posted PM'r locks up my sale for days! on 03/12/2009 22:50:25 MDT Print View

Watch out for the guy who posts "PM sent" on your gear swap item 5 minutes after you post it and says he'll take it and asks for paypal info, then when I PM back asking for shipping information so I can get all costs. He waits a whole day to get back, saying he thought shipping was included, though in my post make no reference of shipping included. It takes another day for him to say he could get it new and shipped for what I have it listed (I don't know where). If he could why would he tie my sale up? I PM back that I'd split shipping, so we both win, he never responded, If he had said he didn't want to pay shipping after my offer to split, I would have made the deal happen anyway with free shipping!

This kind of thing really bites my Behind! I know this is not the first time this kind of thing has happened on this site and probably won't be the last, but that doesn't make me feel any better.
I just needed to sound off....

Jonathan Boozer
(anywayoutside) - MLife

Locale: South East
Re: Posted PM'r locks up my sale for days! on 03/12/2009 23:13:02 MDT Print View

Tad do you recall what happened the last time you "needed to sound off"?

But no matter...I agree, and I have learned to be kind and realistic at the same time. Just make sure you post + actual shipping or shipping CONUS included...or whatever you want. Do that part for your own good. It removes any guilt or feeling that you were unclear. After I've been contacted with a "I want it" I usually give people a defined time frame to put up or shut up. It's a matter of hours if other people are in line for the same item. Lines have to be drawn to be crossed. Sometimes life gets the better of any of us and makes it hard for us to respond in a timely fashion....so if your buyer's great uncle stubbed his toe and he was visiting him in hospital...as sad as it may be, if you sold that sleeping bag he had to have to someone else in the two days you could not reach him - THAT'S ON HIM. Be Reasonable, Realistic and let the rest of it go. If you're doing right you know it.

Tad Englund
(bestbuilder) - F - MLife

Locale: Pacific Northwest
Re: Posted PM'r locks up my sale for days! on 03/12/2009 23:27:59 MDT Print View

Jonathan- yes I remember, but I can't help myself (remember I type before I think).

My issue is on the Gear Swap, when someone posts "PM sent", I think it is an unwritten law that mean "sale pending" just like in real estate when you see a "sold" sign up it really isn't sold until it "closes", but most people in the market move on. I know at times people que up but not always- I just move on.
The post "PM" means to most, its gone, so they move on and the item becomes shop worn.

The biggest bite is when the PM'r says he'll take it then reneges on the deal! Yes it bugs me.

Edited by bestbuilder on 03/12/2009 23:28:36 MDT.

Robert Bryant
(KG4FAM) - F

Locale: Upstate
cry me a river on 03/13/2009 08:13:37 MDT Print View

no money or goods changed hands so i don't know what you are complaining about. like you said its just like the real estate market. people back out of deals all the time with houses because of home inspections turning up hidden repair costs. you didn't say anything about shipping either way so just like a home inspection your addition of shipping was a hidden cost.

Steven Evans
(Steve_Evans) - MLife

Locale: Canada
Easily Fixed... on 03/13/2009 08:23:04 MDT Print View

..by stating...

First one to deposit $X.XX in paypal account XXXX gets it.

Tom Caldwell
(Coldspring) - F

Locale: Ozarks
PM Sent Claim on 03/13/2009 08:25:18 MDT Print View

I say give them a timeline to pay. If they want it, they'll pay. I've noticed the practice is to just say "PM Sent". I used to just send a private message w/o putting that on the forum, but even though I probably beat the others, I missed out to someone who posted a "PM Sent" some time later. Posters should at least say PM Sent with inquiry, or offer, etc...

Comparing $100s of thousands in a real estate transaction isn't quite the same as $100s in a used gear transaction.

Tad Englund
(bestbuilder) - F - MLife

Locale: Pacific Northwest
Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/13/2009 09:57:56 MDT Print View

Steven, great suggestion. I just a little nervous hanging my paypal info out there. I've had someone steal my ebay info and buy a bunch of stuff (they were from Nigeria, I don't know how they got it I rarely bought anything on ebay and only conus).
Robert, no river flowing here, this was somewhat of a heads up as much as it was a whine. BTW, in the R/E market you put up earnest money with the chance of loosing it if you back out for no good reason. Nobody wants their property tied up with out some kind of hook. I feel the same here, the stakes are different but the concept is the same- I think Steven has the idea.

Jeremy Gustafson
(gustafsj) - MLife

Locale: Minneapolis
RE: Posted PM'r locks up my sale for days! on 03/13/2009 12:20:15 MDT Print View

I had an offer for an item on Wednesday about noon and have since replied 3 times via PM accepting the offer with no response. I sent them a PM early this morning stating that if I don't see the funds in my paypal account by noon today I would open it up for other offers.

Do you all think I can open my item to the next person in line now or am I being too impatient??

Robert Bryant
(KG4FAM) - F

Locale: Upstate
Re: RE: Posted PM'r locks up my sale for days! on 03/13/2009 12:28:13 MDT Print View

you can do whatever you want. you ain't screwing anybody unless money or goods have changed hands.

Chris Chastain
(Thangfish) - F

Locale: S. Central NC, USA
Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/13/2009 15:06:32 MDT Print View

> First one to deposit $X.XX in paypal account XXXX gets it.

As long as you don't mind issuing refunds from your paypal account.

Steven Evans
(Steve_Evans) - MLife

Locale: Canada
Re: Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/14/2009 10:17:17 MDT Print View

As long as you don't mind issuing refunds from your paypal account

Refunds? Who said anything about refunds? :) First one to deposit gets the item. Second one to deposit gets nothing. Quite a lucrative business actually ;)

Steve O
(HechoEnDetroit) - F

Locale: South Kak
simple solution on 03/14/2009 10:40:07 MDT Print View

Assuming you want to sell the item quickly and/or avoid holding the sale up with deadbeat buyers/interested parties.


1. create thread and list item for sale

2. someone posts "PM sent" on your thread

3. read the PM, respond, and let them know that you will be bumping the thread with "pm responded to, item still available" if they don't pay instantly (or within X min, etc).

I don't think is is disingenuous for an interested party to post "pm sent." I think in most cases the individual got excited about the item but has a further question. They would like to catch your attention and get their question answered asap before someone else jumps on it.
Some even think that it may hold the item for them for awhile while they get more info or think it over (and it does work this way in some cases). However, the seller has the ability to make it clear that the sale moves forward if he/she chooses.

Edited by HechoEnDetroit on 03/14/2009 10:46:33 MDT.

Chris Chastain
(Thangfish) - F

Locale: S. Central NC, USA
Re: Re: Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/15/2009 08:38:15 MDT Print View

> Refunds? Who said anything about refunds? :) First one to deposit gets the item. Second one to deposit gets nothing. Quite a lucrative business actually ;)

[Slaps self on head]

Why didn't I think of that!

Edited by Thangfish on 03/15/2009 08:38:54 MDT.

Craig W.
(xnomanx) - F - M
Re: Re: Re: Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/15/2009 08:58:52 MDT Print View

For what it's worth, I think it would be a good idea if we stuck to the system of writing "PM sent" on the forum.
Last time I was selling something, people were getting in line as seconds and thirds, but many of them were only stating this in PM's; there was no public record of it.
I'm then left with the responsibility of trying to convince the second person to respond on the forums that they're actually the fourth in line.

Also:
PM sent DOESN'T mean you're the automatic buyer if you're offering LESS than the asking price! If the fourth buyer is the only one saying they'll pay asking price, it's the sellers right to go with them.

For this reason, I find it really annoying when people start haggling!
Stop it! If someone says they're selling it for $20 + shipping, if I don't like those terms, I don't make an offer. Jumping in line first and then lowballing someone's price is pretty lame.

Too bad so many people are always trying to come up over $5-10. It really slows the whole system down and makes selling ugly.

Chris Chastain
(Thangfish) - F

Locale: S. Central NC, USA
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/15/2009 09:24:00 MDT Print View

A "PM sent" message is great to alert others that there is interest in a given item, but it doesn't prove who was first with said PM.

If you feel you must convince someone of who was first, it's easily done. Every message has a date and time on it.

*Of course* it is the sellers right to go with the first buyer offering the asking price, and I can't see anyone not agreeing to that point... but you ain't going to stop haggling. I would suggest including the term "FIRM" with your "asking" price if it really annoys you.

Jumping in line first with a low-ball offer is ok if there ain't no line, and many times the seller will gladly accept it.

I have purchased MANY high dollar items on forums such as this (except they usually have rules or terms of engagement for buyers and sellers) and this system works very smoothly and efficiently.

Many times the seller will ask too much for an item, and not get any bites. Offers usually help him figure out what the going or fair price might be.

Of course I normally wait a couple of days after the original post to make an offer.

I wish that BPL had feedback ratings and comments tied to a users account. Not foolproof, but it's a great indicator.

Rog Tallbloke
(tallbloke) - F

Locale: DON'T LOOK DOWN!!
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Easily Fixed... on 03/19/2009 01:25:44 MDT Print View

I wish that BPL had feedback ratings and comments tied to a users account.

Better make sure no-ones carrying first.